Meccanized

After a workload-related blogging hiatus, I work up this morning ready to re-enter the blogosphere and prepared to look for annoying things that I could Meccanize.  I didn’t have to look far.

I give you The Slanket.

Designed for people who want to look like wizards while they are trying to stay warm.  Or who are too lazy to put on extra clothes but are incapable of handling the complexities of a draped blanket while they are doing their every day tasks like reading a book or ordering a pizza.

There are also a number of competing products, including the Snuggie.  “Blankets are OK but they can slip and slide, plus your hands are trapped inside.”  I wasn’t aware that blankets offered similar functionality to handcuffs, but apparently this is a real problem.

And, on a whole new different level of stupidity, I give you the Hawaii Chair.

It’s a chair.  That has a 2800 RPM motor in it.   The chair basically jerks you back and forth while you”go about your business” (you know…read, write, talk on the phone… do all those things that are easy to do while your nether-regions are spinning around uncontrollably).  And when did sitting on your ass become an integral part of working out?

There is also the Flowbee, but that deserves a whole other blog post.

Blanket capes and vomit-inducing furniture, you are Meccanized.